Twisting Strengths into Insecurities – Megan Noll

She looked at me, then thoughtfully and carefully said, “Sometimes Satan is great at twisting our gifts into our insecurities to keep us from using them to glorify God” 

Over drinks with a friend, I was telling some stories about my time on a mission trip to South Africa….to be honest, it’s taken me years to appreciate all that I learned on that trip.

If you’ve been in any Christian circle for any amount of time, you’ve probably been apart of an “encouragement night” bible study. I don’t know the technical name for these, but it’s where everyone in your bible study goes around and talks about the way each person is glorifying God. Sometimes they do it while washing feet.

Even though these are meant to be something kind and uplifting, I always dread them. I love giving praise to others, but I hated it when it would be my turn to be in the spotlight. Mainly because I always get told the same things:

“You’re so bold!”
“You aren’t afraid to speak up for what you believe in.”
“You are so passionate.”

But what I was hearing was more along these lines.

“You are loud.”
“You are too opinionated.”
“You are annoying.”

Everything that was said, I was taking as a backhanded compliment. For me, this “encouragement” was a way of taking my faults and my annoying quirks, and try to say something nice about them.

After our bible study that night, after hearing exactly the things I expected, I was feeling defeated. Before heading back to our cabin for the night, a leader struck up a conversation with me. We chatted for a while, and after telling her about my feelings over these types of bible study, she said something that changed my life.

“Sometimes Satan twists our strengths into our insecurities to keep us from using them to glorify God”

MIND. BLOWN.

My thoughts raced back through all of the things my group had said about me. I’m bold. I’m not afraid to speak up for injustices. I’m passionate. None of those things are negative. They are gifts God has given me. If I am self conscious about those gifts, I am going to try to hide them and I’m not going to use them for his glory. I think that was the first time in my life that someone told me I don’t have to apologize for who I am. I should celebrate.

That insight gave me a whole new sense of confidence, and I’m hoping that by me sharing it, it might do the same for you. Are your gifts being hidden behind insecurities? What could you do, if you didn’t try to change the person God made you to be?